Just search #aftersex on Instagram (an empty stomach is advised). You think I’m joking? A post-coital selfie? Who would do such a thing? Did you just hop off a spaceship? Everyone does. And… it can help them nod off quicker, which gives you more time to check your Twitter or google “how to get someone the hell off me without waking them” while their hair tickles your nose and you try desperately not to sneeze. Cuddling up forges intimacy and can help you associate positive feelings with a person or a situation. It works in social situations too, helping you feel affection for people you spend time with. Remember oxytocin, which I mentioned mere moments ago? It’s also known as the “love hormone” or the “ cuddle hormone” as it’s released when people snuggle up together and helps you bond. Who are you to resist your body’s natural urges? Well, my advice would be to invest in matchsticks or perhaps a can of Monster by the bed, because the only thing less chivalrous than falling asleep before your partner is coming before they do. According to tireless research by scientists desperate for 40 winks after nutting, it could be down to a release of hormones that make you drowsy – prolactin, which tries to coax you into REM sleep, and oxytocin (more on that one later) are thought to be the main culprits. But you can blame basic biology for this one. Go to sleepįor some reason, falling asleep right after sex is seen as the height of rudeness, like burping in a restaurant or yawning while someone is telling you their problems. If you don’t trust yourself not to sound like a one-star review on TripAdvisor, keep it to yourself. If you have doubts about how it went, approach them gently and be clear you’re only asking because you want to make sure you’re doing everything you can to give them a good time. “Did you come? But did you, though? Did you? Are you sure?” is never going to elicit the answer you want. Best not to focus on negatives or badger them for praise. What better time to talk about sex than when you’ve just done it? “How was it for you?” is an underrated question: tell them what you especially liked, what you’re looking forward to trying again next time. Now the earth has stopped moving and your vision is returning to normal, here’s what to do next.
But once you’re done, then what? Very few sex manuals bother to tell you what to do once you’ve done the deed. Or it can be spontaneous, coming out of nowhere – literally, in some cases – and being taken by surprise. Sex is all about the thrill, the anticipation, the buildup and then finally getting down to business.